Aww, this gave me my first good laugh of the day. I have to smile every time I look at it. :)



Three Stooges Gallery

Try as I might, I could NOT find a picture of the old clock on St Patrick's Cathedral that I just posted about. That is why you got the huge artsy photo of the church instead to take your mind off the loss. But lo and behold, my friend Shona near Dublin informed me that I was in luck as she had taken a photograph of it when last she went to church.

As it is so large and grand-looking, I will put it behind this cut so you can click on the link and view it in all its Irish splendour!

( 450 year old clock )

Telegraph.co.uk
12 August 2008



A man thought it would be fun to have sex with a park bench, but then he got stuck. The paramedics thought they could free him by taking some blood from him (I'm not even going to ask...), but they ended up taking him AND THE WHOLE PARK BENCH to the hospital to be cut free.

The doctors said an hour more would have necessitated amputation. I'm sure this would have been harder on the person than the park bench. hahaha! Then the article said this sort of thing was not unusual:

'There have been several recent cases of people having sex with unusual objects. In May 2008, Edward Smith, claimed to be involved in an intimate relationship with a white Volkswagen Beetle. (I'd like to ask HOW, but I'm not sure I really want to know...)

Separately, Scot Robert Stewart was placed on the sex offenders register after being caught having trying to copulate with a bicycle.' (I suppose, then, that all the parents had to keep their young bicycles away from Robert...)

I hope this has given you a smile or two. :)

I just think >>this is too hysterical for words. :D

Daily Express



A visitor accidentally stumbled into a cordoned off 9 ft tall sculpture called 'Christina' [see photo] and broke it!

Subsequent visitors thought the broken shards on the ground were part of the exhibit and snapped pictures of it all. *cough*

The loss is over $12,000. *more coughing...*

'Christina' was considered to be the star of the show, but this is understandable when you know that the woman curator named Tracey Emin [seen above amongst the art with the ill-fitting blouse and bad hair] of this year's 240th Royal Academy Summer Exhibition, sparked controversy with explicit art works including a sculpture of hands and penises [I believe one of those is also visible here if I am not mistaken...] and a video of a naked woman hula-hooping with barbed wire.

ohhhhhkayyy...

Sometimes I listen to the jazz station, especially on Sundays because they play different programs like 'Soundscapes,' and the music is very relaxing and pretty.

One type of work I have noticed is the smooth sexy songs where the people are TALKING in sultry tones in, you guessed it, French.

Okay, I dun speak French, nor do I understand it, unless the word 'snail' is mentioned. I suppose the song composers think it sounds very alluring and provocative to have a couple talking in French whilst the beat of the music simulates the rising tide of...well, sexuality.

I'm sure we are supposed to think the man is saying:

'You, you sexy desirable little sex kitten [in this case, chaton]. Come here and let me make passionate love to you all night.'

And of course, she will respond in French:

'Mmmm, my handsome adorable stud muffin [in this case, croissant]. Take me awaaaaay!!'

But for all I know, he could be saying:

'Jane, you ignorant slut! Why aren't the dishes done? I am hungry, and I want my dinner.'

Whereupon she retorts with a gleam in her eye:

'Do the damn dishes yourself, Alphonse, and eat at McDonald's for all I care. I have been watching the rotten brats all day, and I dun give a flying feck about your dinner!'


--Just a thought. ;)

A whole page of smart ass Star Trek pics at Icons by Echo

This one is for Steve. ;)

Flying Spaghetti Monster



From Wikipedia: The Flying Spaghetti Monster (also known as the Spaghedeity) is the deity of a parody religion called The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and its system of beliefs, "Pastafarianism". The religion was founded in 2005 by Bobby Henderson to protest the decision by the Kansas State Board of Education to require the teaching of intelligent design as an alternative to biological evolution. Because intelligent design implies the existence of an intelligent, but not necessarily omnipotent or omniscient designer, some, like Henderson, argued that this designer could, in fact, be anything imaginable.

In an open letter sent to the education board, Henderson parodies the concept of an intelligent designer by professing belief in a supernatural creator called the Flying Spaghetti Monster which resembles spaghetti and meatballs. He furthermore calls for the "Pastafarian" theory of creation to be taught in science classrooms.

Due to its recent popularity and media exposure, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is often used by atheists, agnostics (known by Pastafarians as "spagnostics"), and others as a modern version of Russell's teapot and the Invisible Pink Unicorn.

...Henderson explained, "I don't have a problem with religion. What I have a problem with is religion posing as science. If there is a god and he's intelligent, then I would guess he has a sense of humor."

Beliefs

Henderson proposed many of the beliefs in reaction to common arguments by proponents of intelligent design.

The canonical beliefs of Flying Spaghetti Monsterism are set forth by Henderson in the Open Letter, the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and on Henderson's web site, where he is described as a prophet.

The central belief is that there is an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster, who created the entire universe "after drinking heavily." The Monster's intoxication was supposedly the cause for a flawed earth. All evidence for evolution was planted by the Flying Spaghetti Monster, in an effort to test Pastafarians' faith — a form of the Omphalos hypothesis. When scientific measurements, such as radiocarbon dating, are made, the Flying Spaghetti Monster "is there changing the results with His Noodly Appendage."

The Pastafarian belief of heaven stresses that it contains beer volcanoes and a stripper factory. Hell is similar, except that the beer is stale, and the strippers have VD.

Henderson uses parallel concepts from religious texts when describing the FSM, poking fun at those who literally interpret the Bible. The religious text of the Pastafarian religion is called the Loose Canon instead of the formal Canon. In place of the Ten Commandments, it contains the Eight I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts.

The official conclusion to prayers is "RAmen", contained in certain sections of The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and so on. It is a portmanteau of the Semitic term "Amen" (used in Judaism, Christianity, and Islam) and Ramen, a type of noodle. While it is typically spelled with both a capital "R" and "A", it is also acceptable to spell it with only a capital R.

Pirates and global warming

...According to the Pastafarian belief system, pirates are "absolute divine beings" and the original Pastafarians. Their image as "thieves and outcasts" is misinformation spread by Christian theologians in the Middle Ages and by Hare Krishnas. Pastafarianism says that they were in fact "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of good will" who distributed candy to small children, and adds that modern pirates are in no way similar to "the fun-loving buccaneers from history." Pastafarians celebrate International Talk Like a Pirate Day on September 19.

The inclusion of pirates in Pastafarianism was part of Henderson's original letter to the Kansas School Board. It illustrated that correlation does not imply causation. Henderson put forth the argument that "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800s."

Visit the Church of the FSM

This morning I got up and was trying to wake up whilst I took care of the cat, and I saw this flash card in my email from one of my Care2 group members. It will make you smile. The little dancing stars are adorable and the ending is funny. :)

dingo.care2.com/cards

Enjoy!